A truth I used to hide that now fuels my work: decades of therapy… and very little change.
Transactional analysis, cognitive behavior therapy, inner child work, integrative therapy, person-centered therapy, Gestalt, spiritual therapy, family constellations, internal family systems, whether in group or 1:1, I’ve been in therapy for almost two decades.
Which means I’ve spent years analyzing the past.
Years focusing on why some stuff happened, why I was suffering, what created these “wounds,” and what would trigger them.
My daily vocabulary was filled with words like “healing,” “wound,” “trauma,” “neglect,” “shame,” “guilt.”
Year after year, I didn’t realize that I was consolidating a deep-seated belief that I was “wounded,” and that therefore, my future would equal my past.
I acquired excellent understanding about my past “and could talk about it with scientific names” (quoting Steve Chandler here).
But from such a victim position, only very little change was possible.
The victim-identity paradigm, as it is reinforced by certain therapeutic models, is harmful. And I say this with full respect for professionals who believe in its efficiency.
Where your focus goes, energy grows (Tony Robbins).
In 2019, my Sedona-based therapist declared, “Amrita, now you’re therapeutized out. Now it’s time to create the life you really want,” and he did something really great: he gifted me a Tony Robbins audio!! (thank you Krish)
Little did he know that he had just opened a whole new world to me: a world of limitless possibilities, personal power and transformation, all grounded in self-awareness and action.
I can’t repeat enough that NLP and Coaching (with a capital C) transformed my being from the inside out, and each single area of my life.
Just like a light bulb turning a room from darkness to light.
First, NLP helped me change the story I was telling myself.
My inner narrative shifted from “I am a failure” to “I am worthy and I can do anything.”
Updating my beliefs about who I was, what I was capable of, why I was here, and what was possible was a game changer.
Then came the power of taking aligned, bold, and consistent action. Ongoing.
So let’s wrap this up.
If you’re doing therapy right now, it means you’re looking for a change.
And let me ask you four questions:
1) Is your therapy helping you build a positive self-image?
2) Or is it building a wounded, fragile self-concept?
3) Are you seeing an inner child at the driver’s seat of your life?
4) Are you using your past as an explanation for why you’re not living the life you want to live?
If so, I suggest you start asking yourself different questions:
✨ What do you really, really want for yourself, and why?
✨ Who did you come here, to this world, to be?
✨ What makes you think you’re not the captain of your ship?
And if you’re willing and ready to take the next step, get a Coach.
#RadicalResponsibility #CoachingForTransformation #RisingUp #NLPCoaching #SelfLeadership
